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                                                            Repentance

 

            Something inside us longs for a new beginning, getting beyond that chronic struggle. We look down the road and hope that just around the corner things will change.  We hope the same old cycle will shift.  Perhaps our circumstances or efforts will eventually bring us into a new life, a new world, joy.  The child looks forward to summer vacation.  The young person can’t wait to graduate.  The investor waits for the return on their investment.  You put in those last few years of retirement looking forward to freedom.  We wade through the swamp we slosh through the difficult, waiting for that turning point.  Sometimes we drift into the place where we can’t imagine life being any different, where the road runs straight off the horizon with no deviation, straight as a lemming off a cliff.   We’re trapped, imprisoned by regrettable choices.  Bitterness and cynicism take their toll, shutting off any life remaining.  Our sophisticated sense of reality smothers hope, trading it for pride.

            We have a desire to start afresh built into us.  We anticipate.  And as the saying goes, anticipation is often greater than realization.  But, in the case of repentance it’s not true.  Repentance is the door to fulfillment, a turning point where everything changes, the ultimate threshold.  A threshold that isn’t easy to cross because of our old hostility toward God.  But none the less it’s the stumbling upon a great treasure, the dawning of a new life.  And he’s at work every day engineering circumstances, encouraging us to repent.  Once we cross that threshold he begins the process of making us like himself, the very thing that will fulfill us.  But it can’t happen until we repent. 

             Repentance is becoming right with God, the place we turn around and begin a life of change.  Though God is using everything at his disposal to lead us there, it’s still a rare thing.  Jesus said only a few find it.  Those few aren’t the educated few, or the popular few but those who are willing to run cross-grain to their pride and instinct to connect with him.  That’s what makes it rare.  Some people are just too busy running in circles to take the time.  Others can’t muster the honesty to confront themselves.  But most people simply refuse to submit under any circumstances.  Rare?  That’s why God gave us the freedom to choose, because there’s no meaning in a relationship when people are forced into it. We understand.  Like him, we don’t want friends who are simply using us.  We don’t want people to hang around us because they think they have to, we want people to love us by their own choice.  Finding people like that is rare.

            Repentance can also be confused with other phenomenon.  Take for instance those who recite a formula and consider that repentance, say a few magic words and we’re in.  I hope you can see that’s not repentance.  Beyond that, there are many people who feel content thinking they are on good relations with God because they concede he exists.  They neither love him nor interact with him.  But they know he’s out there somewhere and therefore hope he’ll deal nicely with them because they verify his existence.   That’s an unfortunate point of view.  In James 2:19 we find the statement,

            “You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that and shudder.”  The Devil and his host, who are hostile toward God, know without a doubt that he exists.  They know what he’s like and what he wants because they’ve experienced him before time began and walked away.  They have no interest in him and understand the consequences of their choice, so they shudder.  Conceding his existence is obviously not repentance.  Yet, this isn’t the only mistaken point of view.  There are a number of other things that are confused with being right with God, subtle things. So, it might be helpful to look at those things that are not repentance.

            Repentance is not what’s called fox-hole Christianity.  In fact fox-hole Christianity isn’t Christianity at all.  Consider the person who stumbles into a major crisis. They tend to instinctually drop all pretense of their political and rational belief and cry out to God.  You might say, I’d never to that.  Well, you probably haven’t been that scared yet.  This knee-jerk response seems to be built into us.  In the American culture we don’t run into this all that often because our affluence tends to mask the pain.  But life still presses people to the edge and sometimes you find yourself in a foxhole.   

            The interesting thing is that God responds to those who cry out for help.  In fact the Scriptures tell us that he’s responsive to even the ungrateful and wicked.  They call out and he responds.  Amazing.   His motivation is clear.  He says that he is kind in the hope that it will lead them to repentance.  That’s from his side.  From their side it’s possible to have the mistaken idea that if he’s helping them it’s because they’re good people and on the right track.  He wouldn’t help someone that was hurting him, would he?   If they’re not careful they could easily fall into the habit of exploiting him, asking for his help as they accomplish their personal goals.  Then they talk about how they have this arrangement with the man upstairs.  This arrangement is a very personal thing, something they don’t want others to critique.  They ask for help and he helps.  Though this is profound it shouldn’t be confused with repentance.  His hope is that over time, they would progress from their exploitation and see that he’s more than capable to be in charge of everything in their lives.

            Another phenomenon that is confused with repentance is what we might call an educated investigation.  Consider our friend that has called out to God in a crisis. They know that God responded, it’s no mystery, no coincidence.  So they figure that they might examine him a little more closely.  God draws people into this curiosity to engage them.  Eventually the Scriptures come into play.  They open it up and read, suddenly the Spirit of God begins to open them up and something happens inside.  It says that the Scriptures are alive, piercing deep within our souls.  That’s what it means when the Holy Spirit takes the Scriptures and turns a light on.  It’s a profound experience. Your life is laid bare, as if someone who knows everything about you puts it all out on the table for you to see.  What started out as an examination of God becomes an examination of you.  And unexpectedly you learn something of him.

            This encounter has a dizzying effect.  You work your way from story to story asking him to speak.  You’re convinced of his presence as he brings an understanding of life.  You see it, you understand it, you experience it.   This penetrating experience can make a person feel they are intimately involved with God because of the unusual interaction that’s been going on.  It is intimate, but it’s not repentance.

            Another step in this progression can also be confused with repentance.  Let’s call it experimental faith.    Continuing with our friend who did some investigating about God, their curiosity has compiled some information about him. They find that God is calling them into some challenging things.  God is asking them to trust him.  Our friend writhes a bit, knowing that God is asking to run cross-grain to their instinct and habit.  They feel the resistance of the old hostility in them.  Perhaps, they’re being asked to trust him in something economic or relational, at work or at home.  In any case it’s something new and difficult.  God asks them to try him out, experiment.  In the end, let’s say our friend does.

            At this point God designs a circumstance where they can practice.  They recognize it a few days later, and marvel at the experience.  Gingerly they do their best as the situation presents itself, trusting and doing what he asked fairly well. They experience something unusual inside, getting a glimpse of Life.  A life that is possible outside the daily grind.  They not only looked through a window, but opened it and took a breath of fresh air, they could taste it.  This sort of experimentation can go on for years, decades in fact.  It cultivates and nurtures trust.  But this still isn’t repentance.

           It's an easy thing in the local church to confuse repentance with other phenomenon.    We don’t rationally sit down and say that God helped us in a crisis and suppose that this interaction was repentance.  I don’t think we go to the extreme, saying that repentance is the same thing as being pierced by the teaching of his Spirit.  Nor, do I think we deliberately confuse ourselves by saying that we have experimented and found God to be trustworthy, equating that with repentance.  But too often, what does happen is that we are so immersed in the unimportant that we settle into a contentment of pleasant interaction with him.  It’s not rational, it’s simply instinctual.   We have this feeling that since he’s been so gently involved with us, we must be eternally connected.  

            Well, he does love you a great deal.  But only at the place of repentance are we adopted into his family.  Think of it this way:  There’s a big difference between taking in kids who need your help and love, compared to your biologic children.  The relationship is drastically amped-up.   All the love we experience from him, before repentance, is very moving.  But that simply speaks to the profound effect awaiting us beyond the threshold.

            Then, what is repentance?  Well, it’s abandonment to him.  This abandonment is far reaching.  It’s where we turn around from a whole way of thinking, a whole way of life.  You can’t do that cold-turkey.  You must experience him in such a way that prepares you for this decision.  At repentance we decide not to trust our perspective or experience anymore.  We decide to shift away from our long-held goals and dreams.  We no longer hold ourselves credible or trustworthy.  We now run everything through his counsel and critique on a ruthless search, ferreting out all attempts to deceive ourselves.   We no longer exploit him for the carrying out of our agenda, but give ourselves fully to his.  It’s the place we relinquish, as the old saying goes, our right to ourselves.  This is not for the timid.

            The first time this happens for the disciple, it happens deliberately.  We might call it repentance with a capital ‘R’.  It doesn’t happen as a child and it doesn’t happen without you knowing it.  If it happens, you’ll remember when you did it because every fiber resisted it.  Our old nature wants to fog the issue, distracting back to the unimportant.  But, once done, our lives become a progression of little ‘r’ repentance where we say no to our old nature and yes to him, it’s called obedience.  Or another way to put it, we make a conceptual decision to abandon ourselves and follow that up with specific instances of obedience day after day.

            Repentance does mean to ‘turn around’.   That’s the technical term.  Unusual as it may seem, we can be religiously involved with him without turning around.  We can be amiable toward him.  We can even be in the ministry, in leadership and do dramatic things in his service.  We can go to exotic places and deal with profound metaphysical phenomenon and still not have come to repentance.  We can even point people to him, all without turning around ourselves.   Repentance is something to be clear and careful about, because your eternity depends on it.  Something in you will resist it, even to death.  But there’s a longing in us to turn the corner and find a new beginning.  Repentance is the ultimate of new beginnings, a rare treasure indeed.